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(A fragment of something bigger I was working through one Friday night)

Wanting and dreaming of wresting love back
from fate and physics and fury and history and pain,

Futuristorical histrionically
interintrinsicalligorically imperative…

This is what your love was to me.
This is the me that is no more without you.
Unmoored in mourning black & white-knuckling
sober divorcee’s blue, red and grey.
In twilight’s every minute of the day…
Since you went and you
Moved yourself away your embrace denied…
The mourning after the day you voice-mailed me your love died,
My one and only foolish-impulsive ex-bride.

Why do I choose to continue
Enacting my ruminatin’ magisterbations anon and on again?
Another word jazz jelly tonight
Over matrimonially mutual delusional decisions made,
Of impulsively romantic adventure aventured
By two overgrown children one summer.

Because smartphones are apparently the new books…

 

Too easy to be lost.
Too easy to forget
while stuffing your face
with anything to fill your particular void.

Too easy to chase dragons
chemical emotional and intellectual
aimless as the minutes pass relentless.

We twist too much into ourselves,
tying attention into endless knots,
living in a tesseract we assemble
to avoid the inevitable truth.
Better to face the walls you make
than to stand naked before the mystery.

Easier to run
the mazes
you make within
Than to risk
the terror
the other out there
Isn’t it?

I never actively pursued journalism in college. I was a theater major at first, then leaned toward English as a major. I seemed to back into publishing as a consequence of being my father’s son.

With the experience I had, a couple of things were obvious from the get-go. First, THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS THE LIBERAL MEDIA. Anyone who’s spent more than a minute in a journalistic setting will be disabused of that notion immediately. Thus, anyone who subscribes to this myth is either being actively dishonest with themselves or with you, or is an idiot.

Or both. Fox News exists as a way of creating and maintaining a dull and credulous audience of mental deficients who are played Pavlov style with tropes that should have died with Reagan’s brain.

Also, and somewhat related: the phenomenon of “unbiased reporting” is not the default setting of journalism. It is what gets taught in school–the five Ws are as basic as the reverse pyramid of crafting a story. But it’s *what sells papers*, or *what gets eyeballs on your page* that is the true default setting.

In the American hegemony, “news” is a business–mainly because we know of no other way to operate. Consider how PBS finds constant difficulty getting and keeping funding for its often stellar reporting.

Raw data is culled and shaped first by the story’s author, no matter how objective that author thinks he or she is. Then, it’s passed by an editor who further refines (or dilutes, depending on whether it’s your words) the product into something that gets shoehorned between ads, the space for which is what pays the bills.  And if something about that story will piss off (or merely annoy) one of those paying customers, the story is further “refined” or deleted all together.

(04/19/2013)

 

2016. Sandy echos low by the shore… 

We could have been legendary lovers
Sing clingy caught between the earth and the sea!

She sings tingling clinging to te-titty.
Rap turn a wrap clap trap you know how it feels—
Legendary lovers ever living real for it is we!

I love you, all you that I loved before,
adrift with me here with thee
And more by the sandy shore…candy store.

What sort of difference would it make?
Afloat up in a sea no key aqui she clings tenaciously for teatitty sufficiently
Who knows—
What sort of difference would it make—
What chance circumstance she dance a trance romance she drove to the shore—
Afloat in a sea…aqui…

All four books together.From left: Turboblues (2007), Roadside Truckstop (2009), Adventures In Ordinary Time (2010), Primal Soul (2015).

Each a little bit of me, all available in print, or through Amazon for Kindle, and Google Books as well, save for the latest one.

About what awaits afterward…

And I am bathed once again
in a sea of thoughts and whispers.
Too long alonely in a single head,
I rise into the light of being known
And knowing again all things at once.

The amphora is shattered,
The simulacrum forever irrelevant.
The water once contained
now mingles in a sea of infinity.

We are together infused diffuse,
yet stronger in this truest union
Of god intermixed and interbeing.

We await your return to us
From your material cell ensouled
With what you’ve learned alone.

Primal Soul–
MY soul–
is complete.
It is my masterpiece.
My most brilliant work
worthy to be
remembered throughout
the centuries!
*
*
check me out on the goods right here…
What if Jesus did not die on the cross?
He is my son
Caesarion,
So he was drugged a’la The Passover Plot,
and spirited away,
Away to Tarsus.
There, he took on the name
and identity of
The one called Saul,
later known as the apostle Paul,
who had an epiphany
on the way
to Damascus:
Why don’t I
Preach that I
am the
messiah of the Gentiles?
Be it also known
That he
Was the
One We know
As
Arminius,
Who took away
Augustus’
Legions…
And he
Willingly
Stepped down
From his throne
In the heart of Rome.
Because he already stuck a knife
into the heart of his true enemy,
The real Satan,
Octavian,
Thus we live now
In  the Kingdom of God
We thus have earned.

This is old. 25-plus years old. I remember singing this reggae to myself as I drove home from school, down 101 to Carr’s Store, where you turn onto 137 to go to Hancock. This was the earliest portion of the original Roadside Truckstop to come into being. Here you go. I love you.

 

Living in the concrete jungle
Where life is a constant struggle
Living from day to day
It all ends the same anyway
If life is too big a load,
Go to the end of the road.
Go to the elephant graveyard
You know we all end up there someday.

You know we all got our own path,
And life moves too fast.
If a little good comes your way
You know it’s too good to last.
If the road is too rough a ride
Go to the truckstop by the roadside
Go to the elephant graveyard
You know we all end up there someday.

(spoken)
Well it’s just my opinion,
And this is my final refrain,
That it don’t take a genius
To figure out life is pain.
I tell you there’s a better way
Than to weep on the shards of a bad day.
But if you need some way
To follow the sunset someday
Go to the roadside truckstop
Or stop in there one day.

(10-5-88 to 12-97 inclusive)

The real question you have to ask yourself is, what if she does go away?
What if she was never there?
A figment of your imagination?

I think I dreamed about you on a winter morning
A hundred years ago, when I was younger,
Of a girl who was dreaming of me simultaneously.

I think I heard your voice whisper to me in the dark much later on,
When I was alone and desolate in that far-off cell.

I think many nights you wiped my tears away
When I begged for relief from myriad wounds.

I know you were always the other half of me.

It’s nice to finally meet you.

Please don’t go away.

Some kind of dystopic stuff is afoot from Tom Wheeler and the FCC. I mean hilariously awful. A lot of people are writing Tom.Wheeler@fcc.gov and openinternet@fcc.gov to let their feelings be known. I figured I’d tap something together and hopefully make a new buddy while I’m at it! Neat huh?

Mr. Wheeler:

You must be an intelligent, thoughtful man. You were certainly smart enough to leverage your relationship with companies like Comcast and Verizon into getting the Chairman’s seat at the Federal Communications Commission. Bravo sir. I too aspired to civil service. Good gigs, usually.

Now the agency for which you work is chartered to “regulate…interstate and international communications by radio, television, wire, satellite and cable in all 50 states, the District of Columbia and U.S. territories.” says so on fcc.gov. That’s your mandate.

Your proposition for “net neutrality” does not follow that mandate. Not even a little.

It will allow a cadre of massive companies–like Comcast and Verizon–to do the regulating for you by essentially selling their services–high-speed internet access–to the highest bidder. Only those that will be able to pay their outrageous levies will be able to get their content to end-users.

And this will be the most beige dreck there is. The most inoffensive, mediocre pap that companies like Disney and Fox can shovel out there in the name of capitalism.

But wait! There’s more!

Because we at the other end of the wire are also paying outrageous levies to use these services, you are allowing these massive companies to essentially “double-dip” for the same lousy service.

So we’re paying, they’re paying too. My, but they must all *love* you now, your former clients. You’re going to make them obscenely rich–richer than they already are, which is perhaps the greatest obscenity of all.

That might actually be your goal here. It sure looks like it.

And by the way, *none* of these companies are investing in infrastructure improvements, or in increasing broadband speed and reliability. Not at all. There are actual third-world countries with faster throughput than we have in the United States, and are getting it for less money.

Tom, that’s just embarrassing. I can call you Tom, right? You’ve read this far after all, we’re almost buddies now!

Anyway, these companies are essentially a cartel, cornering a market and using their money and influence–influence you helped them get–to stifle innovation. If a town wants to set up a public broadband utility, for example, these companies buy the votes and the lawyers necessary to squelch that so they can continue to offer their crappy overpriced service.

You’d know that of course, That was your old gig. Helping your pals at Comcast and Verizon (and AT&T,etc.) keep making their money while offering nothing in return but their monopoly.

If your intention was to con your way into this public office for the purpose of making companies like Verizon and Comcast disgustingly rich at the expense of the American people, then you’re doing a fabulous job by the way. Kudos.

I’m not saying it *was* your intention, but it sure *looks* that way from here Tom.

Real Net Neutrality means that these companies get regulated like electric and gas and water utilities–actual public utilities working in the actual public interest. Because only in that way can “an appropriate competitive framework for the unfolding of the communications revolution” (from your site again!) actually exist.

That is your mandate Tom. Says so on the website.

Here’s the thing Tom. You know you’ve stepped in some poo, right? This is just uncool. But you can do the right thing here. You can actually defend Net Neutrality and let real innovation and real competition happen.

Because if you let your old pals have their way Tom, then you are *not* actually working in the public interest. You will be working *against* the wishes and needs of your real bosses, the American people, in favor of money-grubbing corporations who are anti-freedom, anti-creativity, anti-competition and, thus, anti-American.

You will have violated your agency’s charter. You will be removed from your job sir. We will petition, and protest, and do all that is necessary to have you removed from that comfy chair.

But you, me, we’re all cool people right? It doesn’t have to get ugly does it?

You’ve got the opportunity to be kind of a hero here. You have the opportunity to let the future actually happen. Support real, actual Net Neutrality. Be brave.

 

Thanks Tom.

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