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Monthly Archives: September 2008

Today is Meeting Day on the Mickey Mouse Club, and I thought I would share a revelation (chuckle, snort) that I had yesterday.

I was a terrible boyfriend. 
I inserted the chuckle and snort because, well, I am sure if any of my exes remember me, they will remember the good times, but also the times when I was belligerent, when I would argue because, well, don’t all people who love each other argue?
When I would demand too much sex, or not want it when you did (that didn’t happen often, but it did happen). 
When I was petulant and pouty for not getting my way. See previous paragraph.
Or worst of all, when I wouldn’t call. I am still bad at this one. Or wouldn’t be in the moment with you, or pay attention to other women when you were the one I “loved.” 
When I got too clingy, too needy, and castigated you when you got clingy yourself, and so not call you.
When I confused lust for love, and vice versa, just hurting both of us in the end.
Or when I got high because you weren’t affectionate that morning. That one kills me to this day. You know who you are, and I can still see the disappointment in your beautiful face.
I am truly sorry. Truly truly sorry, and I am putting this out to the world in the hopes that you might google me, find this page and read this far.
I am not putting this out there hoping for a hookup, or even a hello in fact. You can find me if you want to say hi, and I urge you to say hi if you wish. 
I hope you all are well and happy and at peace. I love you all and always will, no condition, no obligation.
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My favorite movie is Smokey and the Bandit. Hands down. Well, that and The Quiet Man. But Smokey is one of those quotable movies. My most favorite movies are. Of course, Jackie Gleason was the show-stealer in this movie (“If they’da cremated the sumbitch, I’d be kicking that mistuh Bandit’s ass around the moon by now.”), but I always liked Cletus Snow–the one Snowman. He was the straight-man, sorta, to Burt Reynolds’ Bandit, and was indispensible–nobody could have played Snowman but Jerry Reed.

Oh yeah–he was also a country-western legend, and one helluva picker
I will miss you son…