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Monthly Archives: June 2013

Two o’clock. Can’t sleep. Labyrinthine thoughts once and again don’t you know? The breeze from the overhead fan reminds me of something. Now.

To this from that,
Into here yet there too.

Losing, lost,
Winding, wending
Into such inner intricacies!
Such eternal internal

Words wind and wend,
World without end,
And yet
You forget
Persistent wind
Past your ear,
Against your cheek.

Now passes to then
While you lose yourself

The sun’s been out
All this time.
Wind whispers past your ear
Reminding you
There’s more outside
Than inside.


Used to be, one would run across these sorts of lists on Facebook all the time. Not so much lately. Ah well,… I grabbed this one and started filling it in. I think I’ll find something constructive to do.

I love you. I wish you knew. I wish you felt the same. I wish I mattered. Maybe not.

1. Last hug: My mom, I think.

2. Last phone call: A message @ work

3. Last text message: What?

4. Last song you heard: “Gimme Some Lovin’” by the Spencer Davis Group

5. Last time you cried: After we buried Grandma.



6. Dated someone twice: Of course.

7. Been cheated on: Too often.

8. Kissed someone & regretted it: Yes.

9. Lost someone special: Yes.

10. Been depressed: Of course.

11. Pulled all-nighter: Heh…



12. Blue

13: Red

14: Grey



15. Made a new friend: Dunno.

16. Fallen out of love: I haven’t been *in* love this year.

17. Laughed until you cried: No

18. Met someone who changed you: This year? Not yet.

19. Found out who your true friends were: Hmmm…

20. Found out someone was talking about you: Oh sure.

21. Kissed anyone on your friend’s list: NO dammit…



22.How many people on your friends list do you know in real life: Most of them

23. How many kids do you want: That’d be a neat trick. Lemme tell you why…

24. Do you have any pets: No.

25. Do you want to change your name: Why?

26. What did you do for your last Birthday: Took a long drive.

27. What time did you wake up today: 4:00 AM. Not on purpose.

28. What were you doing at midnight last night: Sleeping.

29. Name something you cannot wait for: Love?

30. Last time you saw your mother: Just a few mins ago.

31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: The scars.

32. What are you listening to right now: Pandora

33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Sure.

34. Who’s getting on your nerves right now: Me. I am my own worst enemy.

35. Most visited webpage: gmail

36. Whats your real name: John Gilman Grow II, or jr. Whatever.

37. Nicknames: Go fuck yourself.

38. Relationship Status: See 37, above.

40. Male or female: Male.

44. Write w/e you want here: Surprise motherfucker!

45. Long or short: Shaved.

46. Height: 5’10”

47. Do you have a crush on someone: YES. Dammit.

48. What do you like about yourself: RIght now? Not much. Try me later.

49. Piercings: See 37, above.

50. Tattoos: See 37, above.

51. Righty or lefty: Lefty. Of course.



53. First piercing: N/A

54. First best friend: Andy Beckmeyer, when I was five. That and the bear.

55.First sport you joined: See 37, above.

56. First vacation: That I remember? Yuma, when I lived in Wichita



59. Eating: Nothing

60. Drinking: Diet Rite

61. I’m about to: Check out hulu

62. Listening to: Barbara Ann, The Who (Pandora)

63. Waiting for: Godot.



64. Want kids: I’d have to get nookie again, so reply hazy as fuck.

65. Get married: Sure. Maybe I can get it right.

66. Career: Technically I am on my third, I guess. Maybe fourth. No, fifth.



67. Lips or eyes: Both.

68. Hugs or kisses: Kisses. Though hugs are sometimes underrated.

69. Shorter or taller: Shorter. But this is negotiable.

70. Older or Younger: Hmmm.

71. Romantic or spontaneous: Both

73. Sensitive or loud: Sensitive

74. Hook-up or relationship: Either would be nice for their own reasons.



76. Kissed a stranger: HELL YES.

77. Stole something for someone: Not on purpose.

78. Lost glasses/contacts: No

79. hurt yourself: Often

80. Broken someone’s heart: Yes.

82. Been arrested: Ummm,…

83. Turned someone down: Yes.

84. Cried when someone died: Like a baby.

85. fallen for a friend: Yes.



86. Yourself: Sure.

87. Miracles: Not so much.

88. Love at first sight: Yes.

89. Heaven: No.

90. Santa Clause: NO!

91. Kiss on the first date: HELL YES.

92. Angels: No.



94. Had more than 1 girlfriend at a time: . Tots

95. Did you sing today: ‘At Last” by Etta James. You had to be there.

96. First person in your contacts: Whatever starts with A

97. If you could go back in time, how far would you go? Back? Why not forward?

98. The moment you would choose: To see Siddhartha under the tree.

99. Are you afraid of falling in love: Afraid of being hurt again. And hurting again.